Back to normal?

All has returned to normal, at least I like to think so.

On Monday my husband went back to work. My children are back at school. They started back today. I took Monkey Girl to Pre-K and then to the library for a pre-school program. She loved it. The Head Children's Librarian searches for a variety of programs for the children's enrichment. The program that was offered today was one that Monkey Girl hadn't been to yet. She loved the singing and the dancing. She adored the parachute, making the craft and playing with toys. The only thing she didn't get to do (during the hour) was try out the play doh. This is not a big deal, I have play doh at home. She had a great time.

After school and the library she and I came home and I made lunch. At 2 PM I managed to put her in for a nap. Mind you, with all the "stuff' going on last week and a playdate over here yesterday, she really hasn't napped for the better part of a week. Somehow, even with the tears, she fell asleep. Unfortunately this nap was to be short-lived. I got a call from the school nurse, Computer Boy (well, there's just no better way to say it) pooped in his pants. She wanted to know if I was going to pick him up or just bring a change of clothes. I replied that I didn't know until I spoke to him. He's had gastro-intestinal issues regarding his bowels and is under doctor's care. However, I KNOW my son and there was a chance that with having six days off from school and he was probably tired of working.

Folks, I was right. He was hoping to come home and play on the computer. When I told him, in no uncertain terms that there would be no computer today (at all), he decided he'd stay at school. In addition, if I let him come home early, I'd be rewarding him for having "accidents". Frankly, this is not the first visit to school for this issue I've made and it's time he's learned that it's not ok to ignore your body and what it needs to do. Computer Boy has made a little progress in this area but lately he's been lax, so I need to stand my ground. Various people (friends and two of my sisters) have voiced opinions regarding his issues, but seriously unless they're a medical professional I'm not listening anymore. This is something that he can't be punished for (well, not entirely), in time, he will learn and everything will fall into place. The boy is on the autistic spectrum and my husband and I are doing whatever we can to help him. So, to my friends and family, unless you have something constructive (and, by constructive - I mean positive) to say, then don't say anything at all. I don't wish any of this on my worst enemy, but until you live a day in my shoes, you have no idea what I've been through and have no right to comment.

As I re-read the last paragraph, I thought well, it's not really that bad. But, it is. My son is not the problem. He's made great strides this year and continues to grow. He's a sweet boy who is kind and generous. The problem here is their supposed well-meaning comments. They have a way of making me feel, well like a bad mother, that I'm not doing enough for him or I'm doing too much. What I need to do is figure out a nice way of changing the conversation without being rude or nasty. I know I said I didn't want advice, but you guys are different. You're kind, thoughtful and truly care about others. So, if you have any thoughts or ideas, please let me know.